Missing Words

24 01 2011

Where did my words go?

Sometimes I sit here looking at a blank page and will the words that used to come so easily to dance upon the white background and provide me with some salvation from the craziness of my reality.

But they don’t come. I want so much to tell you the truth, to tell you how I have self destructed in such a big way that even my blog friends, who always have a positive and warm thought for me could not justify my actions.

I had it all … everything that other people dream about, but I threw it away, rejected it and then destroyed the giver simply because I can’t function in the real world like other people – I need to be shackled, locked up in a mental hospital where they can keep me from poisoning the world that surrounds me.

I’ve walked so many lonely roads, battled the wilderness but still I do not learn my lessons, still I hurt and destroy, still my words come so harsh in a world so gentle.

I am here … all the time I am here …

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One response

1 02 2011
Duma Key

My friend I hear your words, though distance pulls, we walk the same roads.
Often in the dead of night I haunt my page and words no longer come, just a vast emptiness of nothingness that consumes my life.
My blood is poision, dripping oozze upon the world, so vile that it polutes all around, once more I gained so much and as one incapable of there own distress pulled it all apart.
Over and over in my mind I run through it all, and stand back as once again I destroy it all….Nothing is as it what, nothing is as it should be, nothing will ever be the same again……we are shadows of the night, and yet hope lays, it baits our paths and while there is that slim hope we hold on, hold out for a dream….that will never come.
I feel your pain and miss your words my friend, I come here often in search of you, your thoughts, some glimmer of hope in a world that is lost.
Hold on, you are stronger than this, you ahve overcome so much, dont fall at the last hurdle……

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